My Top 10

I've taken a long hiatus from the blogging world and I've had many people ask me when I was going to start posting again. Too much has happened since my last post so I couldn't just pick up from there. Then I had an idea. I would restart my blogging habit with a fun new post--- a post of my Top Ten Most Embarrassing Moments Ever. Those of you who know me well could tell you that I often find myself in unlucky or unfortunate situations. So, I decided to make a list of my 10 most memorable. My friend Kristin says it best "God has these things happen to you because other people can't handle it." Hope ya'll enjoy it! Love, KK

10. We’re going to start off my list with a mildly entertaining story from my senior year of high school. I was a cool older sister because I could drive my brother and his neighbor to class every day. One such school morning I was running a little late; my brother and his friend were already in the car so I was running down the hill of our front yard to get to my car. Unfortunately the grass was a little slick because it has rained the night before; my feet came out from under me and I slid on my butt the entire way down the hill. I was running late as it is, so I just picked up all my stuff and threw it into the car. I didn’t realize until I actually got to school that the entire back of my jeans was covered in mud. Like the quick thinker I am, I went and dropped my stuff off at my first class and then snuck back out with the teacher noticing. I went to visit my sub school secretary who wrote me a pass to go home and change. When I came back with clean clothes every single person, including the teacher, commented on my new outfit. I guess I actually didn’t “sneak out” of the class like I thought.

9. Lovely number nine of this list happened quite a few years ago during my elementary school years. I was on a travel soccer team called the Hurricanes. George Mason University used to like to invite the local travel teams out to their games to be their “ball girls.” We got wear our uniforms, hang out with the team, and chase down balls when they were kicked out of bounds. At one of these games, I was sprinting to run down a ball that went out of bounds and ran straight into a wooden hurdle. The hurdle went straight into my stomach, knocked me to the ground and the wind right out of me. The game had to be stopped momentarily so that the athletic trainer could come make sure the clumsy ball girl was okay. The stands all clapped and cheered when they helped me to my feet.

8. As many of you know, I ride my bike to class every day as my method of transportation. Last year I used to live in an area called Larchmont, it’s ride next to campus so it’s an easy ride to class. To get from the Health Sciences building to my house you had to cut thru the center of campus. One day I was on my way back from class cutting thru campus when out of nowhere comes a skateboarder going around the curve. I thought he was going to get out of my way but instead came right at me. I had no choice but to bail of my bike directly into a pile of dirt. This collision occurred at lunch time when everyone is busy changing classes. Everyone stared but absolutely no one helped me up. And to top it all off the skateboarder says to me afterwards, “Dude! Are you okay? Why didn’t you move, didn’t you see me coming?”

 After my triathlon this May... I used the same bike that also collided with the skateboarder!

 

7. Lucky number 7 on my list happened not too long ago. On this night we all went out to this Mexican bar for Karaoke. After a few too many tequila shots, margaritas, corona’s, etc. not only did I sing N’Sync karaoke, but I also managed to make out with our Teaching Assistant who was at the bar. It wouldn’t have been so bad if it didn’t happen in front of EVERY SINGLE ONE of my classmates and if he didn’t happen to be bald or newly divorced. Super nice guy, don’t get me wrong, but I’m never gonna live this one down… hope he gives me some good grades this semester though!

 

6. Taking a walk of shame the morning after a rough night is bad enough as it is, however, if you’re sneaky you won’t get caught. Let’s just say I’m not so sneaky. One time in my college career, I spent the night down the street at a friend’s house. I really didn’t want anyone to know that I had stayed the night there so I was hoping to get out of there early in the morning. By 8am I heard every single one of this guys roommates upstairs, I mean what college guy is up at 8am on a weekend?! Since I didn’t want to get caught I thought it would be a brilliant idea to just sneak out of the downstairs window. I gracefully made it out of the downstairs window, but unfortunately every one of those guys conveniently made it outside to the back porch and witnessed the entire thing. Talk about a walk of shame.

5. This embarrassing story also occurred in the good old college town of Statesboro, GA. One of our favorite bars to go to while I went to school at GSU was a place called Rude Rudy’s. We were frequent customers at this bar and often knew some of the bouncers or bartenders. One night I arrived at Rudy’s later than everyone else. Everyone had gone to the bar a little bit earlier and had already gotten in. There was a HUGE line out the door to get in and obviously I thought I was too good to wait in the line. I could see my friends sitting outside on the deck so I decided I was going to avoid the line and just hope the fence onto the deck. This worked out fine for awhile until one of the bouncers noticed I never got an over 21 wrist band. The bouncer came up to me and told me that I needed to leave. I guess I didn’t listen well enough because he grabbed the 2^nd bouncer and they grabbed me underneath my armpits and literally carried me out the door. My friends watched and laughed as they kicked me out the door. As the bouncers were about to drop me out the door I said to them “I was only stopping by anyway, I really just wanted to go to the Nikel.” They responded by dropping me and telling me to get on my way.

4. Number 4 on this list occurred as a result of a drunken decision making. I believe it was my junior year of college and Kala and I decided it went be a really good idea to go boogie boarding down the stairs of our townhouse. We had so much fun that we took the boogie board down the street to our friends house so we could all take turns riding down the steps! Kala suffered a sprained ankle, our friend Justin claimed to have “crushed his balls”, and I had my own unique injury. The morning after the boogie board adventure I woke up with an extremely painful butt bone—I mean it was so bad I could hardly walk and could hardly sit down without screaming. So, I decided to go to the training room to have it looked at. The trainer looked at me, asked me how I did it and I had to lie to him and tell him I fell on the tennis courts so that he would treat me. He ended up sending me to the health center where they took X-rays of my butt from various angles. Turns out it was just a bad bone bruise, but I had to sit in an inner tube for nearly a week because it was so painful to sit on. I don’t know which part of this story was more embarrassing: having our male trainer examine my ass, having my ass X-rayed, or sitting in public in my inner tube. Either way , this story definitely makes the list. 

 Kala and I on the boogie board

3.  The third most embarrassing moment brings us back to our high school years. Your high school years are just plain awkward—you got boys, acne, new boobs, heart break, these years are just rough. Now boys be cautious, I am about to enter some territory you may not want to hear about. Consider this your warning. This embarrassing moment occurred after I got a super tampon stuck up inside of me. I mean I was 16yrs old, had used a tampon before, but for some reason when I went to pull this one out… all that came out was the string. This was a little awkward and I just could not get the darn thing out, it was freaking stuck! I told my mom and she called the doctor, and the doctor said to wait the weekend and see if it starts falling, if not I had to come in Monday morning to have it removed. Knowing my luck, the thing did not budge and I had to go see the gyno. Keep in mind I had never been to the lady doctor before, I was only 16. So the nurse leads me back to the exam room and tells me to remove my close and yada yada. I was really confused on what to do so I ended up just keeping my shirt on and sitting on the exam table with no pants. The doctor finally came in and was a little surprised to see my pantsless with no covering over top of me. She kindly gave me the nice paper sheet to put over my pelvis. Next, she cranked me open, removed that sucker that was stuck up inside of me, and then I waddled out of the doctor’s office. Not only was I mortified to have had to go thru this traumatic experience as a 16yr old, but I had to go straight from the ob gyn to my high school weight training class where I was the only girl.

2. My second most embarrassing moment most of you already know about so I feel like I do not need to describe it in great detail. Last September we had our prestigious White Coat Ceremony. At this ceremony, all of the first year PT students receive their white lab coats to sort of symbolize us all entering the profession. It’s a really nice event, everyone gets dressed up, all of the faculty attend and everyone families come into town. When it’s time for you to get coat, one of our faculty members calls your name and you and your “big buddy” (who is usually a 2^nd year), walk up on to center stage. Whenever my big buddy and I walked up on to stage we had a minor mishap. Whenever my big buddy put on my white coat, it got stuck somehow underneath my dress. So, as I was pulling the coat up over my shoulders, my dress was coming with it. Yes, it’s  true—I ended up flashing my entire class, faculty, and associated family members. And lucky me, it was all captured on film!

 Caught after the flashing incident!

1.   1. And finally my absolute worst, most mortifying story of my life… For my 23^rdth of July this year. Here’s a how our convo went on this day: birthday this year I got a smart phone. Now these things are really smart—too freaking smart if you ask me. The smart phone I have does this cool thing that links all your facebook friends to the contacts in your phone. It links facebook pictures to your contacts, phone numbers, etc. I thought this was really cool until it back fired on me. Anyways, so on my new smart phone I would randomly text one of my best friends Thomas funny stories or random things that happened to me. For example after one night this summer I woke up and sent him a message that said “oops, made out with my bald TA last night at the bar. Hope I get all A’s next semester.” Or another morning, “woke up in my bed naked, alone, and with half a quesadilla next to me. What did I do last night?” And one time I even texted him something like “Glory hallelujah! I got my period.” (I really, really hope my mother never reads this blog!) Thomas has been one of my best friends for years so we pretty much tell each other everything. Sometimes he never responded to my messages and I was a little upset that he didn’t enjoy my funny messages. I finally found out why he wasn’t responding when he called me on the 4

Thomas: “Hey! Happy 4^th of July, how are you?”

Me: Thomassss! So good to hear from you, I miss  you!

Thomas: Yeah…  So I have something really awkward and kind of uncomfortable to tell you about.

Me: Oh okay, what’s wrong?

Thomas: Well you know how yesterday you text me your new address?

Me: Yeah.

Thomas: Well you actually didn’t text me, it was my dad.

Me: Weird! How did that happen?

Thomas: Well actually, I think my dad has been getting a lot of text messages from you. He told me he’d been getting some weird messages from an unknown number and then today he got that text with your new address.

Me: Oh shit.

Thomas: Yeah, so actually all those times you’ve thought you were texting me… I think it was going to my dad.

Me: You have got to be kidding me…

Thomas: (Laughing hysterically) Anyways, my dad asked me to call you and tell you what was going on and to please stop texting him. He’s feeling a little uncomfortable.

Moral of the story: Smart phones are too freaking smart. Thomas and his dad have the same name and since I was friends with both of them on facebook my smart phone linked their numbers together. Please NEVER EVER make the same mistake I did or else you will forever be a walking embarrassment. 

 My friend Thomas and I back when we were kids.

P.S. Since this encounter, I had to spend a weekend at Thomas’ family’s house. I spent the whole weekend blushing and biting my tongue because I knew his dad would never look at me the same way.